We’ve updated our Terms of Use to reflect our new entity name and address. You can review the changes here.
We’ve updated our Terms of Use. You can review the changes here.

Whisper & Shimmer III: "our hearts will fail"

by ethan dwayne bell

/
  • Streaming + Download

    Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
    Purchasable with gift card

      €8 EUR  or more

     

1.
I fell in the bay again caught myself the tail of a whale and snuck inside only to find a little heart taken apart by cold cold hands and a marching band led me to the secret hidden by the pieces of broken women and men now I am long ago when things moved slow sky beneath our feet and no one knew how to drive I kept the secret I kept it safe from falling into enemy's hands
2.
I had it mind to tear you up tender and mild I need the sea to be exact so I could put you back together again, but a tempest swelled up and drove all your parts away pieces of you that I could not save so here I go stretching skin around a broken heart that I can't mend I hope she doesn't notice that she doesn't look at all like she did from the start before I touched her at all I must have been drunk when I said that I can hold you without losing my grip hold on, shut up, leave me alone I don't know you at all, I don't owe you at all pretty faker, go on and make her a smile, a wink, and a fresh sense of sleep and hold back the water I don't know why, but in her eyes I can see every heart beat that I skipped and I'm sorry that I didn't see that I was tearing you apart without knowing at all how those architects even built your heart I was careless and impatient and I didn't read the warning and now I'm left holding an incomplete heart and now that we're even I'll go ahead and start another fight and another reason to fall apart I don't want to hurt you anymore than I'd hurt myself oh I might as well just fall apart
3.
my captain 03:36
the whisper in my ear is singing me to sleep and I can't help this tear from burning on my cheek or stop myself from clenching teeth cause when hot red swollen cheeks fall asleep my captain tells me that's it's a hard, hard life running from yourself I'm never gonna know you now but I'm gonna love you anyhow
4.
well here I go, once again. I go dancing out that door to someone else's song I keep my messages to myself and I'll mail myself a letter when I get back to the beginning of this song. and then some friend that I've never met before will ask me up to dance and if I've ever been to France, and I say, yeah, but it never compared to Dresden in March, walking alone in the dark on the bridge in the fog then my momma calls from some other land and says I should come home again so I pick up my bags and things and think about it for a while and realize I'm already there and then I read my mail.
5.
the accident 05:11
you ran red and you hit the innocent in the head light footed dance on us all and me afraid that you'll fall I don't know this I don't know you at all apparently I'm so fucking small I think I want you on my team don't mean to seem that I idolize at all it's just that I am scared to death of myself of myself
6.
well I once knew a man whose penis fell off it fell off in the middle of a crowd and a whole bunch of people were staring at him and staring at it as it rolled around well he tried to put it back on but it wouldn't fit so instead he put it in a shoe and left it on a shelf it's been there for years I swear to you that this is all true well I once knew a girl who accidentally dropped her baby on the floor and as it's head cracked open it made a big ol' mess so she pulled out a mop and a broom and as she mopped she felt ashamed for first thinking about the big ol' mess instead the dead baby she now had lying in the trash and I got no regrets, I'm not embarrassed at all if you ask me that again, I'd probably say I was wrong and every time I try to do the right thing my hands get mixed up I don't know which one leads and as my head goes down my right gets left behind why do I try to figure out all my mistakes when they'll happen anyway and all my friends think I've been a waste and time will erase every face in my way I once knew a kid who accidentally found out his parents weren't his parents at all instead they were agents of some secret society that's intentions were morally wrong and the way they treated him was a downright shame, yeah the way they treated him was a crime so he notified the authorities and had them arrested and ever since he's been alone ever since he's been alone, ever since he's been alone, ever since he's been alone
7.
drunk love 03:56
when I touch my lover's back, my cold fingers begin to dance up to a neck I'd like to choke, yeah I'd like to choke it to breathlessness I'm so eager to please her I can't hold my knees still I don't know why I am so afraid to love her she's my lover but I don't really love her, no not in some selfless sacrificial way I got to hold onto myself and love her from a distance where I feel safe but I can always drink myself to death cause I love better when I'm drunk oh I love better when I'm drunk take these bottles away I want to see, I want to see straight my love is coming in for a landing my love is awake I must be too drunk I have completed, what, this, okay
8.
scuttle 05:19
move, skin, touch, I'm holding my breath for hours, and hours, and hours on end choke-hold, I'm cradled in arms that don't know how to quit I'm moving, subtle parts are moving I'm sinking, quiet down my heartbeat I'm leaving, don't know if I want to the surface, behind me I see daylight behind me, and you're a hungry woman and I am a desperate man, desperate man you've got just enough air for me, to breath to breath, to breath tear off my clothes and run an ax through the deck I've had enough of this shit I can't take it scuttle the ship at Marianas Trench so I can fall in love at that bottom of this please hold me, please wait inside of me don't move to fast for me I can see you sinking faster than me tear off my shirt and run an ax through my chest I'm too scared of this shit I can't take it please let go of me, please don't keep hold of me you move too fast for me, I can see you sinking I can see you sinking faster than me
9.
middle of the woods taking the devil's advice eating my beans and drinking my wine out comes the night and the night is cold think I'm going to build myself a fire and keep myself at the right temperature middle of the woods and my head is on fire run down to the lake got stuck in a mire now I'm going to wait and sink my feet bears and the wolves are going to make me a feast they're going to eat me alive limb from limb from my toes to my teeth oh no, hold on you might survive this
10.
vicodin and wine I spent all my quarters now the jukebox is mine well it's you, it's you that take up all of my time casting your shadow all over my mind I'm sorry but I'm already gone anyway how's your day I hope that nothing went wrong maybe you and I tomorrow can go grab some grub but right now I'm here and all I want to do is get fucked up wish I could explain why loving me is so damn hard baby, it's because I was born with a broken heart when the bottle is empty maybe I'll tell you why now I got a drink, sit down and shut your pretty ass mouth and if you want to take my bones back to your place take off my britches and give me sloppy kisses all over my face... I always end up on your breasts in between your arms being held back from a world I can't get a hold on
11.
there's a lump in my throat where all my words have been caught I can untangle them with a glass of gin I can drain them out with a ball point pen I've got blood running up in my head I have had lovers that have said I'm too picky to please too tall to reach to small to notice to arrogant to focus but I've got sex in my hands too much I don't understand off with my head find that switch and turn me off instead I can dream, oh yeah I can dream momma won't you leave a light on tuck my feet up in a blanket nice and warm and won't you brush that monkey off my back and hold me, I don't want to move and won't you sing me, sing me that song it won't take me all that long to count my sheep and fall asleep and dream away all those seams the day wove up just for me I won't my hold my tongue I'll sing along I've been sitting still for way too long I'm out of here, I'm out of here pull that pen from my throat watch me choke, watch me
12.
monkey on a limb with its tail in the air it's about to fall I down I'm not prepared carefully remove all the sin from my skin I've got three legs to walk and I'm a terrible friend stepped on the grass and lost all of my teeth removed the box out of the scene mother and dad sewed up my knuckles and knees I'm out of gas I'm out of gas and I'm trying hard not to fall monkey finally fell down and looked me in the face and said gee kid you know its been one hell of a day I've hung by my tail for eighty-seven years and if there's one thing I've learned it's not to trust your peers they're as ignorant and blind as the brain tween your ears talk and they talk and they talk and talk and they talk and your shoelaces are untied there's a hole in my heart I bleed from it quite a lot and there's a sore on my tongue I'll stop talking the second I'm done and there's a hole in my lung there's nobody here and all that remains the feet on my foot and the look-likes of rain rain comes down and washes away the shit on my face the shit on my face carefully remove all the skin from my head carefully remove all the friends from my bed the world turns a page and expects me to move I'm stiff in my place I'm stiff in my place I hesitate I'm going to tie myself to everyone
13.
late at night, lights are out, our little earth spins itself and children are tucked away moon is up, the street's a mirror, the wind blows cold and the drunks are bitter there's something on my back I think I'll take it for a swim from the sewer to the salt and back again I'm on my way, lady you can wait oh it lies in my eyes, the things I could do you wear on me, I wear you like a rusty diamond battle tooth I put inside that mountain every time here's the story, are the letters calling, did you wash your face after all that crawling give it to me and I'll put it back in its place and don't forget to call, I don't want to miss you at all oh to see you waiting at the end of a line that I cannot cross with arms as big as the world I can't wait for you to hold me girl nothing seems to reach you from this end and I can't wait for you girl and I'm almost there, I'm almost there nothing seems to reach you from this end no I can't wait for you girl and I'm almost there
14.
why do I have to be so damn careful when I cross the street is there something wrong with this earth are we just in bad dreams daddy said my mother was abducted by aliens I don't think he's right but she is strange I came from her thighs and on and on the world dreidles on spun a monkey's tail and god knows when it will fall why do I have always have to bow my head when I pray is god under the table does he have a hard time hearing what I say mother do really have a soul will the government take it away when I grow old and on and on the politicians long for mass control and children who fear wet their beds why do I have to end all of my sentences with a period or a question mark, mother please tell me what the hell's going on why do I always have to end my day brushing my teeth are there things that I've said that god thought obscene will little green men come into my room while I sleep drill holes in my mouth and punish me for things that I've seen and on and on the world turns on night lights for little beds children they are the world's only friend why do I always have to be told when to go to sleep is there something wrong with myself will my body not keep or does something occur that I'm not allowed to see mother is that when you talk to aliens and on and on the world turns on when children go to bed and lord knows how men will sin did jesus ever touch himself when he was young or am I the only one with hands sticky with cum
15.
wrong move 04:43
row and mend choked on a ball point pen bend your back choose you moves carefully, don't talk back relax take a break get up grab the ropes the words in my throat are draining out the tide leans back I'm on the attack I'm on the attack I'll forgive myself when I give back I sit so still when I need to I sit too still, more than I'd like to I'm on the attack I'm on the attack I've bent the line in my back and I've already begun to slip back like a rope with too much slack I sit so still like a pile of stones don't believe a single word that I say is that I'm too scared to love you
16.
moving South 05:07
well you floated up into the scene and came right out looking clean with a small mouth and a jug of dirt and your mouth was wrong and full of thirst you should have stayed in bed and slept instead well how far will you go until you burn your toes and you shout out loud 'this is a low and it's sweet as tea' well our hearts will fail us completely now the wind will hang us up, or send us south what have we got to show we're keeping ourselves low how far south will your heart go
17.
mælstrom 02:06
and when I sink with you I hope that I don't die with you I hope that I can say for you that I never cried for you and when you take from me the only kiss I'll give to you I hope that you don't hug too long cause I'd like to float back up falling in love is like a shipwreck I'm drowning I don't want to stay down too long I give up, I give up, I give up, I give up I can't hold onto you remember when you made me smile remember how I tried not to

about

The music business lives under a dictatorship of the brand-new. The most recent. The shiniest and the loudest. And so we all keep running until exhaustion, pursuing novelty in a never-ending race to nowhere.
But here at Son Canciones we’ve decided it’s time to stop. To look back, and wait for the gems that have been left behind in this crazy race to nowhere to catch up with us. Some were left behind because of bad luck. Others because they simply didn’t make enough noise.
“Whisper & Shimmer” is a series of re-releases of music that was somehow left behind, but that is too powerful to disappear. We’ll give the songs a second life. We’ll blow off the dust, and try to get the world to see how bright these gems really are.

credits

released March 12, 2021

All songs written by ethan dwayne bell.

"It's a hard life running from yourself," the song "my captain" says. ethan dwayne bell (Texas, USA) knows all about running. At a very young age he had already gathered more passport stamps than most of us in our whole lives. He worked in a coffee shop in Seattle, in a Biergarten in Munich and in a library in Denton. All the while he wrote songs, home recorded them (wherever home was) and played shows under different aliases such as Ethan Bell Dips His Pen In The Company Ink or Ethan Bell Is An Asshole. One day ethan wrote a song that made him realize he wanted to live at sea. So he signed up as a sailor and started traveling around the world on oil tankers, army boats and container ships. He would make mix tapes for the other sailors with his songs, and always titled them "our hearts will fail". After 11 years at sea, ethan came back ashore to watch his children grow up. For a few years he drove around the US working as a truck driver. He now lives in Denton, Texas, where he homeschools his children while pursuing a career as an English teacher. He has never stopped writing songs.

"our hearts will fail" contains a gourmet selection of some of the best and most significant songs ethan wrote between 2000 and 2007.

license

all rights reserved

tags

about

Son Canciones Barcelona, Spain

Quiet songs for restless souls since 2014.

Son Canciones is an independent record label from Barcelona.

contact / help

Contact Son Canciones

Streaming and
Download help

Redeem code

Report this album or account

Son Canciones recommends:

If you like Whisper & Shimmer III: "our hearts will fail", you may also like: