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Whisper & Shimmer IV: "Songs From Spare Rooms"

by Justin Farren

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1.
Cassiar 02:52
I’ve been eating lunch with chopsticks I’ve been singing to myself I’ve been talking with good people we’ve been drinking to good health them with warm shitty beer and me with ice cold ginger ale now I’m gonna make it back to California even if the engine fails ‘cause I’ve seen faces in the mountains I’ve stood up in the clouds looked down on the Copper Valley to that redneck-hippie town I’ve felt the cold inside my bones and faced the fact that, back at home, this will all be sifted through like bits of truth on the Carson Daly Show but there’s a brand new set of circumstances waiting over there and it makes me feel like everything up to this point has been some daytime documentary on all the things you can get done when you don’t know what you’re doing we were southbound on the Cassiar at seven in the morning scraped the windshield, ate some oatmeal and my shoes are still partially frozen there’s a road before us waiting like the ocean toward the sun you’re asleep and I’m daydreaming about a pecan Cinnabon (Chorus) I want to glue this moment to my forehead and walk around the town let everybody see this part of me without having to break it down to little words and little phrases that no one really understands we’ll make a stop off in Vancouver it’s my turn to buy the gas
2.
Hey Bear 02:47
hey bear, hey bear I know you’re out there listening and I realize that I am walking through your kitchen but let’s make a deal… you let me live, I’ll write a song about you later I know you think that I’m the guy who came out last week with the shotgun, the filet knife all bent up on “eatin’ some bear meat” let’s make this clear... I’m just some city boy I couldn’t even hurt you if I tried I know I’ve always been a pessimistic person but I’m changing all that I’m changing all of that if I can get through this alive hey rain, hey rain I know you’ve got your reasons what with the global warming and the changing of the seasons but I was just hoping for a couple days of sunshine for the weekend you can rain all you want on Monday when I go back to work rain on the tourists with their convertible pants and “I went to Alaska” shirts think of the irony when they walk into the restaurant all soaking wet and I’ll conveniently forget to fill their water glasses I know I’ve always been a self-concerned person but I’m changing all of that I’m changing all of that if I can get through this
3.
I used to work a job at Papa Johns dressed up like a pizza slice out on the lawn and I would wave to the passers-by who would sometimes flip me off and every morning I would wake up late even though my classes all started at eight and I would make bad excuses and wonder where my life was going not a whole lot has changed I still make a laughable wage I still wear my pants too low and my Mom still buys a fair amount of my clothing but things got better and I’ll tell you how I learned that life is not tomorrow no it’s happening now I try to make good decisions and I hope they work out and that’s all
4.
I found a photograph of you and I in black and white with our heads down below the Sacramento sun your eyes were taking pictures while my face was speaking volumes about mysteries and things I’d left undone the pickup truck behind us is waiting for the right-of-way but we’re walking slow and stepping on all the cracks two punk ass college dropouts with no hell below or stars above us looking for no future and belonging to no past and I’ve got tapes from lazy afternoons when you still wanted to play the blues and I would sing them because it’s all that I could ever think to do so how are things in your little world? you know I’d call if I could find the time and I’d write you but I do not have the patience and maybe still it’s better that this distance lies between us for in distance there is magic and I thought I’d lost it all but I just left it in this box behind my winter clothes and I found it on this random rainy day the smell reminds me how it felt to be so young and dumb just waiting on some sturdy wind to blow us to someplace we might belong
5.
Big Al 02:40
Big Al says, Big Al says, “You gotta do what you gotta do!” and, while I can’t claim to understand his particular situation, I believe the sentiment to be true and I’ll apply it like a sticker to my metaphorical bumper and drive it around the spiritual parking lot And when the roach-coach of salvation shows up everybody’s buying faith sandwiches me? I just pour another tall glass of what I’ve already got yeah. ‘cause it’s a filthy shame the way we’re taught to blindly motor through oblivious… save for fear of what might happen if we do what we really want to do lately I’ve been thinking about riding my bike to Colorado sleeping out under the stars drinking a box of wine, not to get drunk I just like the flavor or drawing a picture of somebody I think is cool and giving it to them on their half-birthday writing a new song with meandering lyrical content and leaving the fourth line of the second verse wide open just start talking about how I couldn’t figure out any great words to put there and, hopefully, by the time I record the song I will have put together a really fantastic analogy that somehow ties together the otherwise nonsensical wordery you never know “But that’s just a phase”, they’ll say “There’s not even that much to it I know it makes you feel special but you can’t go on pretending you’re the first one to go through it.” girl, I like the way you look tonight I like the way you feel I want to take you in the bathroom and wash your hands of all the stupid bullshit they’ve fed you since the day that you could open up your mind enough to fit in the bullshit I’ve been reading the paper and, apparently, it doesn’t even matter who you are as long as you’ve got what it takes to put the asses in the seats
6.
midnight at the fair carnies playing freeze tag in their underwear somebody puked in the bathroom and the janitor’s got the hose and he’s cursing out loud whoever thought to deep-fry a Ho-Ho the elephants are always early to sleep but the goats stay up late to talk about the sheep and the full moon shimmers on a man-made river and casts a lifeless light down on the tilt-a-whirl the cowboys hang their hats and the Chinese acrobats sharpen their swords then fall asleep in a little ball they all wonder where they might be going come the Fall over by the midway it seems that someone left on the light of the margarita machine but it’s just the log ride attendant and the 4H Queen making love in the ticket booth she’s screaming, “Baby, you can ride for free” some kids snuck in the back gate they’re throwing rocks at the chickens and softballs at the plates the cows wake up and look around as if to say that we are never as forever as we are for today when the morning comes they’ll file in one by one with fanny packs, water bottles and blooming onions in their hands and all around our little world we’ll be dancing for the boys and girls humming like an oiled machine because they came to see a show and a show is what they’ll see
7.
I’ve been known to leave the things that mean the most behind me to carry on then look back with a frightful eye on what may have been a youthful oversight I’m supposed to be a structural engineer it’s a fear that mounts in places that I don’t talk about in social situations my Dad claims, “Life is short...buy the good cheese” he must be wise because I’ve tried and I can’t equate my life to my groceries it’s American Singles for me is it just my age or will I always have this tendency to gravitate toward things devoid of certainty and proudly stray from dotted lines and well-lit signs that guide me? tell me more about the summer you spent sleeping on the floor and hopping freight trains northward, eastward, everywhere still nowhere at the same time that’s the life for me lately I can see that this whole thing is an illusion and in ten years I’m gonna look back and wonder what I was afraid of it’s all I can do to stay sane play these stupid songs all day
8.
there’s a lady sweeping her tree and the toilet paper therein trying to erase every trace of the youthful experience that took place late last night on her front lawn as she lay in bed comfortably watching reruns of “Everybody Loves Raymond” on her plasma screen and I can’t help but catch a smile as I pass by in my truck when I hear her mutter, “what a waste, what a waste” it’s a funny place we’re living in where we can complain about the waste of things that, left to our own, we would wipe our asses with I hope someday I have some little house that little kids can throw stuff at but I won’t take it down no, I’ll leave it up there in the tree and go on vacation and when I get home from vacation, I’ll go up there in the tree and spray a preservative on the stuff to keep it from biodegrading and the years will pass the rain will fall and the stuff will get all sticky and weird and start growing spores and that way, when that kid’s walking his kids to school he can look up in my tree and remember, “I was gonna be a pitcher for The Sox you could’ve asked anybody on this block I was gonna be… nobody could steal away home so relatively undetectably” there is no time at all they just put a clock on the wall and it makes you think you’re running late when, really, you’re doing great you’re where you’re supposed to be otherwise you’d be someplace else
9.
I have no shoes to wear to your wedding I haven’t the money for a proper gift I thought I’d embroider your name on some sweaters but then I figured you wouldn’t be able to read them you know… weddings always make me uneasy the way that they stand up there so confidently and say we’ll be together ‘til death does us part no matter who we become or how bored we might be by the time that we get there
10.
Broken Shit 02:38
this is my song for the guy who stole my bike you should know that the back wheel was not screwed on tight you should know that the brakes lock up when you turn to the right I was gonna fix it when I woke up in the morning but you took it last night I hope it gets you where you’re going it never got me anywhere… except right now I get to go back to sleep this is the verse for the guy who broke into my car took my stereo my mix tape of MAZZY STAR some work ties and a half-eaten “It’s A Boy” bubble gum cigar you should know that the stereo only played out of one side you should know I was gonna wake up and drive down to FRY’S buy myself one of those fancy new CD players with the detachable faces and the shiny lights so just think of what you could’ve had if you had just waited one night and if I believed in The Karma Police surely, they would be circling the scene and they’d be singing, “This is what you get when you steal from a guy who owns nothing but broken shit”
11.
Cornerstone 02:46
every day is a new day but last-nights linger in my hair and tomorrows will take their share which leaves me with this afternoon to meet you at The Cornerstone for breakfast served all day with a smile and a side of hollandaise I even found a parking space and though I forgot to bring my change I found some in the ashtray then I remembered this is Sunday so I bought a temporary tattoo that says, “I love you” the sky is gray in that warm Seattle way that makes me want to sleep all day then wake up late and bake a cake and eat some with you I would like to keep that innocence and clarity just then my cell phone rings but I’ll turn it off when you show up with your hat and gloves you’ll say, “Hey man, it’s been a while” then give me the perfect smile to match my new tattoo
12.
there used to be a shade tree now there’s this awkward palm tree growing in the concrete where rich white people park their SUVs when they find a need for BEVERAGES or MORE! I’ve got a glue gun you’ve got a real gun glue guns are more fun so what’ya say we make some signs and stick’em up on the trees saying, “You don’t want to kill me… you do not want to kill me!” see, my concern is that in two hundred years our wars won’t be for oil or whatever they’ll be for the last shady spot to sit down and eat a sandwich or the only decent place to lay your lover down on the grass because doing it in a parking lot seems trashy and besides you’d get unsightly asphalt burns
13.
Father Carey 01:03
if we were stranded on a desert island and you found a raft that only carried one I think you’d desert me and if the tide came in and cast you back on the beach you would beg my forgiveness then if you got hungry I think you would eat me I think you would eat me Father Carey
14.
where did I leave my sweater? where did I leave my sweater? where awww… I think I must have left it in Santa Cruz at that show I played at the University college ten dining commons multi-purpose room yes I remember it all quite clearly now I was packing up my things when a young female student said I sounded exactly like Jason Mraz and it was then that I set down my sweater so as to appear natural and unoffended as our conversation shifted to autographs and was then abruptly ended when I signed her new CD “-Jason Mraz” so tomorrow I’ll go to Mervyns tomorrow I’ll go to Mervyns tomorrow I’ll wake up early I hope my sweater’s still on sale I can see them all like vultures at the Cherokee Brand clearance rack and by the time I get through all they’ll have left is XXXL and if my sweater’s not on sale I will wait there until it is and I will shiver while I wait because it’s cold and while I’m shivering while I’m waiting for my sweater to go on sale I’ll imagine that girl from Santa Cruz being swallowed by a whale and blaming her new life in a whales belly on Jason Mraz so I was standing in line at Mervyns and the guy in front of me was obviously wearing a toupee and I started thinking to myself what if all of our lives are just really long one-act plays in which we actors try desperately to be somebody else like… hey, look at me I’ve got a fancy house somebody killed a cow and made my couch I’ve got synthetic hair it’s Velcro’d to my head and if that’s the case then I’m concerned that I’m too young to know the truth and I’ll have to spend the next 65 years trying to recapture my youth you know, there aren’t very many words that rhyme with Mraz so when I go bald I’m shaving it off when I go bald I’m shaving it off when I go bald I’ll never ever wear a rug I’ll let the neighbor kids draw dragonflies and beautiful Bengal tigers on my head when I go bald enough and if my wife’s embarrassed by my tigers and she won’t be seen in public with me then I’ll divorce her and the divorce will be quick and painless as far as divorces go because she can keep the house she can keep the couch and whatever I left behind it she can even have my sweater if she ever happens to find it I’m moving out to the woods where I belong
15.
lately I’ve been trying to write every night but nothing cool comes out just a bunch of boring stuff about how life is good there are cookies in the cupboard beers in the fridge some mugs in the freezer to pour them in I love my girl and she thinks I’m alright we built this little house and I sleep good at night my truck passed smog I’ve been trying to jog sometimes that works out other times I just drive to the bakery and in the past when the skies have been so clear and calm I’ve looked inside to find the hidden storm and traded how it feels for all of the information you’d be surprised at how my cynical mind can spin the look and sound of my life’s headlines I’ve made cinnamon rolls into fruitless hesitation so I guess I should just smile at my neighbor’s dog fall asleep on the garage floor with my headphones on I can see from where I stand it’s not really in my hands it’s more on my feet to take me wherever I’m supposed to be and I’m sure that in the not too distant I’ll be tangled in familiar webs uncertainties and past missteps will rise to meet me doubtful clouds will shroud Grand designs and self-consciousness will blur the line between happiness and things I’m told I should be doing but for now, my dearest friend, let’s ride bikes
16.
I’m Leaving in the morning I packed my blue bag while you were sleeping I’m headed up through Oregon To see what can be seen from where I’ll stand I changed the oil the plugs and wires Checked the timing and the tires Bought a map of the western states The Obama books on tape From which I learned that there’s an art to knowing where to place your weight I’ve been tooling along Like that old Charlie Daniels song And drinking too much coffee to pass the time And as if to confirm that Sometimes it’s the water, not the bridge that burns They took my bag of oranges at the Washington line Tacoma was a joke It was like they couldn’t even hear me Until I played the sound of silence way too loud From which I learned that irony is lost On a drinking crowd In Bellingham I ran into old friends Who talked about Alaska and made me smile And when we parted ways I parked outside the place I’d played And walked around downtown until the light And I thought about the day That I heard Dylan say To choose wisely those with whom you share your dream And the interviewer fell out of her chair And the words took wing and broke through the tv screen Flew right into me All the way back home I wrestled with the radio Fading in and out Like the towns and the tanks of gas Another grain of sand in this hourglass Through which more will fall And the best that I can hope Is to see them as they pass
17.
I’m sitting in the corner of the doctor's office waiting room With my grandma and an apple that I brought from home Taking notice of the contrast between the nervous faces of nervous patients And the stark realism of the woman answering the phones Grandma puts on her jacket She says it’s always cold when you get old I’ve always considered her and I to be so different But time is teaching me that it’s sameness That is so much more difficult to identify She says don’t be like me Taking life so seriously I had a family when I was still Just a baby At that moment grandpa walks out of the xray room Buttons up his top button Takes us all out to lunch Go ahead get that cherry coke You got a birthday coming up? The big 21 Doesn’t seem like so long ago It was you and your brother riding in the Cadillac Fighting over the armrest in the back Talking about rocket ship lawn chairs Coffee candies and track Way back when grandpa was the wisest man in the world Nothing has changed at all You know I never thought to thank you For all those rides home I never got to thank you for all that french toast Kerry, we can rise above it all Because you and me We are family So hopelessly undeniably Intertwined like rushing mountain streams

about

Justin Farren is from Sacramento, California. He lives in a house he built with his own two hands – or, as he likes to refer to it, “a living museum of my own mistakes”. During the two years it took him to build the house, he slept on couches and in the spare rooms of family and friends. And he wrote songs. He scribbled down lyrics and melodies while driving back and forth to The Home Depot, sanding dry wall, waiting in line at the city planning department and staring at unfamiliar ceilings, unable to sleep. And then he recorded them in various bedrooms, kitchens, hallways, garages, bathrooms and sheds. When the house was finally ready, he had also made a record. “Songs From Spare Rooms” is much more than just an album. It’s a home.

Thirteen years after the album was originally released, the Barcelona based record label Son Canciones now releases this extended and improved edition of Justin’s masterpiece. All the songs were remixed by Justin in his shed, two previously unreleased tracks were added and the whole album was re-mastered by Eric Broyhill at Broyhill Masters, California.

"Songs From Spare Rooms" is the fourth album of "Whisper & Shimmer", a series of releases of recordings that have been unjustly forgotten. Songs that were somehow left behind in the crazy race to nowhere that is the music industry sometimes, but that are too powerful to disappear. Previous Whisper & Shimmer releases have been Julie Arsenault's "The Creature That I Call Myself", "Home And Other Places I'd Like To Visit" by Me And The Horse I Rode In On and “our hearts will fail” by ethan dwayne bell.

credits

released October 22, 2021

All songs written, performed, recorded and mixed by by Justin Farren. Remastered by Eric Broyhill at Broyhill Masters.
Brian Rogers: drums
Andre Fylling: piano
Ken Burnett: mandolin
Adrianna Devit: trombone
Eric Talley: cello
Jesse Jones: production advice
Kerry Marshall: singing & production advice

Cover photography by Wes Davis.

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Son Canciones Barcelona, Spain

Quiet songs for restless souls since 2014.

Son Canciones is an independent record label from Barcelona.

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